All posts tagged: 2cents

It’s Logical!

“It should always be remembered that the behavior of persons with schizophrenia is internally logical and rational: they do things for reasons that, given their disordered senses and thinking, makes sense to them!” -Torrey, E. Fuller. Surviving Schizophrenia. 1983. Page 49. “The ideas I had about supernatural beings came to me the same way that my mathematical ideas did. So I took them seriously.” -John Forbes Nash Jr. *~*~*~*~* My friend J read a draft of my memoir. He was surprised that my story was not chaotic or filled with confusion. He made me want to tell my story even better, even more, to show that my experience did all made sense to me. I took very deliberate steps to make sense of what was happening to me and around me. Let’s start with hearing my first voice Joe. For the 30 years of my life before that moment, I had trusted my ears without any problem. I have pretty good hearing. When I first heard Joe talking, I looked for where the talking was coming …

Selfish

When I was 36 and very single, I was hit by the narrowing of the time window to have my biological children. With any life problem I face, I turned to books and my friends. I was glad to find Selfish, Shallow, and Self-Absorbed: Sixteen Writers on the Decision Not to Have Kids. The writers in this book talk about how there isn’t one way to life. There were different scenarios for women to not have their own kids. Some had decided not to have kids for various reasons, some ended up not having kids because time had passed, and then there were those who gave away babies. My first thought was I am a woman living in a modern time. I could logically separate being single and being a mother. I decided to become a single mother. I charted my basal body temperature daily for a few months. I took folic acid when I remembered to. My primary care doctor recommended a reputable donor bank in New England. I reviewed numerous profiles and got what I …